Absolut!

As you may or may not know, Absolut Vodka is produced in Sweden.  The Swedes are pretty proud of this fact.  According to Google Translate, the Swedish word absolut means:

adjective ABSOLUTE UTTER TEETOTAL IMPLICIT ULTIMATE IRRELATIVE ESSENTIAL UNQUESTIONING STRICT DEAD UNQUALIFIED

adverb ABSOLUTELY UTTERLY POSITIVELY DEFINITELY QUITE HEART AND SOUL FLATLY MUCH RATHER EVERY TIME VERY

Most of these make sense (in fact, adverb #6 makes you wonder if the Absolut marketing department has an inside connection at Google Translate) but adjective #3?  That doesn't seem appropriate at all.

Swedish people say "Absolut!" quite regularly, the same way that Americans would say "Exactly!" or "Perfect!"  I don't know when that started...but I wouldn't be surprised if the phrase and the vodka both became popular around the same time.

Here's the beef that I have with Absolut, though:  The picture of the bottle at the top of the page is exactly what the bottles look like here, too.  Notice anything off?  That's right, it says "IMPORTED" in big block letters at the bottom.  I mean, sure, "PRODUCED LOCALLY" doesn't have the same stylish look to it, but saying imported is a lie.  A big, bold, blocky, all-caps lie.

You know what it means when a label says "Imported" in America?  It means it was imported.  Maybe not from where you think, but it was imported.  Take, for example, Sapporo beer:

It's a little blurry, but if you look closely at the bottom line, you can read, "Brewed and bottled by Sapporo Brewing Company, Guelph, Ontario, Canada."  Why not just brew it in America?  Because we have advertising integrity and only write imported if it is imported.

On the flip side, find a can of Foster's ("Australian for beer" or, more recently, "Get some Australian in you"). You know what it doesn't say on it?  "Imported."  Ever since Miller took over the domestic brewing operations in 2007, "Foster's is freshly brewed in the U.S. at MillerCoors under the close supervision of Foster's Australia." (millercoors.com)  And since it's no longer imported, the cans no longer say imported.